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The Virtues of the Feminine

June 4, 2002

Men need to distinguish between women who are feminine and those who are inverted.

A feminine woman is receptive to men. She exudes cheerfulness and inviting warmth. A man can make a friendly remark and be well received.

An inverted woman, on the other hand, is fearful and defiant in the presence of men. She has been taught that man is a competitor, or worse, a predator.

These women are out of touch with their nature and you can tell. Woman's essential nature is to be an incubator of love. Her natural role is to create an environment in which living beings thrive. Her destiny is to love a man, and through him her children. Her reward is their love and happiness.

Sexual intercourse and childbirth are manifestations of a spiritual relationship. A man must first plant his spirit in a woman's heart and find a warm reception. That spirit takes root and love grows into a sapling, and then a towering oak. Finally, a child is the expression of this unseen reality.

What are the elements of this male-female dynamic?

  1. The male must present a woman with a spirit that she can embrace. Men generally use money or power to appeal to women. However, a man is much more than a provider or doer. He is an agent of God. Every man has a divine mission and purpose on earth. This mission imbues him with a confident masculinity, which appeals to a woman's higher instincts.

  2. Do women lose their identity in this process? Yes. Partly. Psychiatrist Marie Robinson calls this their "essential altruism." Women were designed to find identity and self-fulfillment in their husband and family. This is positive. Ultimately, women do not get satisfaction in worldly achievement. They find fulfillment from giving and receiving love. They are creatures of love, God's creatures.

  3. The essence of womanhood is the maternal. A woman nurtures and makes things grow. She gives her husband and children unconditional love. Similarly, the essence of manhood is the paternal. A husband gives direction, purpose and security to his wife and family. Everything leading up to marriage is preparation for these complementary roles.

  4. Marriage is a mystical union. Man and woman become one. The sword in its sheath; the record in its sleeve. This union in love is the wholeness we all seek. It is a prerequisite for happiness and personal development. Otherwise, we are stalled, i.e. obsessed with sex. In order for union to take place, a woman must identify her self-interest with her husband's. She becomes part of him. He becomes part of her. Their happiness is one.

Members of couples who remain "independent" are in competition with each other. They cannot know true intimacy. They cannot know true love.

Powerful forces in the world use the mass media to create social trends. These forces are promoting sexual inversion in order to sabotage the nuclear family and destabilize society. They dupe women into denying their femininity and usurping the masculine role. As a result, millions of women are inverted and are missing the boat with men. Rather than creating loving environments, they are aggressive and self-seeking. They need someone to create a loving environment for them. Hence the power struggle that makes "equal" relationships a constant trial.

In practical terms, what does this mean for men? 1) "A man makes the house, the woman makes the home." A man must get his personal and professional act together. 2) He must love the woman who loves him. Otherwise he should leave her alone. 3) Men should not waste too much time on inverted women, i.e. feminists. (A friend said marrying a feminist is like a Jew marrying an Anti-Semite.)

A strong man might help a feminist rediscover her femininity. (See the movie The Bostonians, for an example.) But you're dealing with milk that has curdled. Better to find a woman who is naturally feminine and naturally receptive. This requires many contacts; the Internet is perfect for this. Don't waste time trying to make a shoe fit just because you're starved for love.

I found a woman with traditional values in Mexico and, at age 52, finally have happiness. My wife taught me how a woman creates a loving environment. She gives me s-p-a-c-e, mental and physical. She observes the 3c's of true womanhood. She doesn't criticize, she doesn't control and she doesn't complain. If I look at another woman, she doesn't jump on me. She's my friend, not my jailer. Is she a doormat? She has a Master's Degree in Information Technology from a leading U.S. university and a career of her own. I do all the shopping and cooking and try to make her happy. Our marriage proves that roles can be flexible when identities are secure.

Recently, my wife invited me to watch the Miss Universe pageant on TV. A couple of years ago, I might have slavered over these young beauties. Now you couldn't pay me to have sex with any of them. It's isn't just impending old age. Something subtle happens in a real marriage. Your soul takes root in someone else's being. That's your home. That's where you belong.

Scruples - the game of moral dillemas

Henry Makow received his Ph.D. in English Literature from the University of Toronto in 1982. He welcomes your comments at